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Why a Real Mentor Breathes

 

|  Mark Edward  |

Every find yourself desperate to make a critical life changing decision?

Not sure which direction to go?

Often, a conversation with a mentor can help.

I have many of those conversations with “my guys” every month.

Every week.

Recently, I found myself needing to make a decision that would profoundly impact myself, my wife, my family, and other’s close to me. 

And negatively impacting others I love.

Proverbs says there is wisdom and safety in having many counselors.

Victory depends on having many advisers.  – Proverbs 24:6

Needing some victory myself, I sought to make the right decision.   I sought counsel… beginning with my dad.

We always need men in our lives who have journeyed farther.

He’s my hero, really.

53 years (59 in 2020) of serving the Lord in the office of the pastor.

He faced many difficult times in the early years (like many ministers), but he has come back stronger and doubly blessed in his latter years, as found in Job chapter 42.

My Dad and I in 2010 – and 2018

 

Secondly, I called two of my Millennial friends who provided insight that only twenty-somethings could give.

I also felt led to seek the counsel of one my mentors in particular, Dr. Warren Heckman (“Dr. Warren”); whose 60 years in ministry have born extraordinary fruit.

So under a blanket of Georgia stars, I called Dr. Warren at 12:45 a.m. my time.

I knew at his Southern California desert home it would be only 9:45 p.m.

My seventy-four year old mentor would probably be relaxing under a palm tree and gazing at Mt. San Gorgonio.  When he answered, he sounded groggy.

Dr. Warren Heckman and Ms. Donna

He didn’t recognize my voice.

I said, “Dr. Warren, are you already asleep out there, sir?”  

He replied, “Uh yes…I’m in New York!”

Oh man.  New York.  Eastern Time!

Same as me!!

nothing worse than waking

As I began apologizing profusely, I didn’t even get a full sentence out, when I was kindly interrupted with the warmest and most sincere exclamation:

Mark!!  I’d rather talk to you than sleep!

And he meant it.

As the U.S. Overseer & National Coordinator for his denomination, after speaking in New York, Dr. Warren was preparing for an international flight to three other COUNTRIES, in which he was scheduled to minister.

Seventy-Four years young.

I want to be this cool when I am 74 (83 in 2020).

Dr. Warren and I 
Palm Springs, California
2005 and 2020

Flash back to 2003.

When we served together on the same staff, Dr. Warren had what I call an “open door.”

Often, I would meander down the office hall to ask for his insight into a ministry situation.

An hour later…I’d still be sitting in front of his desk, conversing, laughing, eating out of his personal M&M jar (I always asked, but he didn’t care).

And listening to his Harley-Davidson wall clock rip off a mean exhaust note every ½ hour.

Yeah.  I received insight.

But I always walked away with so much more.

I was accepted.

I was valued.

While his advice was treasured, he showed genuine interest in my thoughts and insights as well.

I interrupted his schedule, but it never seemed to matter.

He listened with his ears.

And his eyes.

And his heart.

Fast forward to 2011.

Dr Warren’s words, “Mark! I’d rather talk to you than sleep!”  should be no surprise.

That wide-open encompassing heart is way of life for him.

It’s not a title. 
It’s not a switch he flips.

It’s a way of leading.  
A way of loving.
A way of living.

Devin Robert Mueller
Jordan Daniel Mueller

We’ve Journeyed Together Since 2008.

It’s Why a Real Mentor Breathes.

He breathes to live.

He lives to help you.

It’s natural.

With some supernatural.

Just a like a healthy husband breathes to help his wife.  Just like a healthy dad breathes to help his children.

So, on a chilly southern evening, while on my upstairs deck, phone in hand, those words, “Mark! I’d rather talk to you than sleep!”  were like arrows to my heart.

Good arrows.

Crossed Arrows Represent a Strong Bond of
Friendship and Camaraderie 

Yes.

I did receive wise counsel, along with the wisdom of my dad, input from my brother, my wife and children, and my Millennial Circle.

Even my 71 year old mother, who taught my hands to make music, had some unexpected candid insight from the wheat lands of Kansas:

Son, if I were you, I’d make that change NOW!! – Mom

The greatest peace came from the Spirit of the Most High God residing in me.

Comforter, Counselor, Advocate, Intercessor, Strengthener, and Stand-By.

I never have to worry about waking HIM.

He’d rather talk to me and He never sleeps.  OK, that might sound cheesy.

But in your dark crisis hour it won’t be cheesy.

comforter counselor intercessor

Ultimately, I made a challenging but correct decision.

While some did not understand (and that happens), it brought great peace.

As one who invests several hours weekly mentoring by phone, text, email, Facebook, Twitter, Facetime, and this website, it was refreshing to receive counsel for myself in the wee hours of the night.

From a Californian.  Who was sleeping in New York City.

My eyes watered with gratefulness.

Dr. Warren, your words were like apples of gold in settings of silver, sir.

They always are.

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.  — Proverbs 25:11

David Camden Mueller
One of the Most Talented Musicians
on Planet Earth

Preaching to Each Other Since 2008.

Gracious. Kind.
Freeing. Confirming.

And so today, in turn, I proclaim Dr. Warren’s encouraging words to my own Mentoring Circle and my brothers around the country:

“I’d Rather Talk to You Than Sleep.”

Many of you already know this way of living.

For you and I have talked of life, our struggles, our pain, our Father, His answers, and our victories.

Phone Calls.  FaceTime.  Laughing.  Guy Jokes.

Losing sleep.  Gaining insight.

Past midnight.

Midnight – At least in New York City.

 

– Mark Edward

October 30, 2013
From my Private Journal, November 2011.


Feel free to reply below or email us privately if you don’t want your mother stalking your personal business.  

We never share email addresses.

We won’t blow up your IN box.  We don’t air your dirty laundry.  Ever.

Copyright © 2013, 2020 by Mark Edward – All Rights Reserved

This article was first published on the site, I’d Rather Talk to You Than Sleep™, which is now,  I’d Rather Talk ™


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Insights tastefully cybered to men.  Once in a while.

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